Jealousy normally has a negative scent. However, it can be a positive attribute particularly given that even God Himself is a jealous God. Jealousy here connotes the right to demand a certain treatment from someone else. The key here is “right”. Many people are jealous over people they have no right to. The right is gotten based on the platform and terms of relationships you have with the person like marriage, parentage, family, workplace, etc. For instance, I have the right to demand that my wife does not sleep with another man. We made a commitment to that effect in our relationship. To demand that someone else with whom I have no such clearly defined relationship behave in a way I approve is to overstep my bounds...
This sense of jealousy has the perspective of being responsible for what is entrusted to you. However, even in an appropriate relationship, a partner’s right is checked by the right of the other party. I may have the right to want my wife to wear a certain dress but that right is checked by her own right to wear whatever she likes as long as the integrity of our relationship is not violated. So we have to strike a balance between what I want her to do and what she wants to do within the confines of our commitment to ensure the health and vitality of our relationship. Marriage does not give partners the right to run each other’s life. The man has the right to love his wife but not to hinder her from living a full life.
Love considers and allows for the best interest of the person loved. If this is not the case, the jealousy is wrong. The attitude that “I can’t bear to have another woman around your husband no matter what” is immaturity. It is a human tendency though but should be balanced by a sense of maturity and trust knowing and hoping that the man is responsible enough to behave himself. If he is not, then you are in trouble because you will not always be around him anyway unless you want to stop living.
Finally, over protectiveness in the name of jealousy is often a sign of an immature love. Love trusts and releases the person it loves. To over protect a person is to suspect that they are weak and fragile and unable to take care of themselves or take the right decisions. That could actually be an insult on the person that is loved. Love empowers and releases the people; not cages and binds them.
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